Scott is home

Friends,

Scott is home and under the care of hospice as of yesterday.  Please feel free to come visit him when you are ready, if that's what you wish to do.

As his spouse, I get asked a lot "what do I say"?  If you don't know what to say, I totally understand.  I don't even know what to say to my husband other than I swear to take care of him and that I will love him forever.  There just are no other words.  If you come to see him, all you have to say is that you love him.  That's all that needs to be said.  He may ask you a question and get you talking about something else and if he does, just go with it.  Let me also assure you, that if it's too hard for you to see Scott going through this - I get that too.  I don't want to see Scott like this, either.  It's heartbreaking that a beautiful man, my beautiful husband with the most beautiful blue eyes I've ever seen, is so sick.  Just do what you can.  I understand and Scott understands.  We all cope differently and I completely respect that.

As of today, he's lucid most of the time.  When he sleeps, the drugs have the effect of making him say weird things and make a lot of hand gestures (he either writes, or drives a stick-shift in his sleep most of the time).  I think you'll be happy that you'll get to have a good conversation with him.  He is using an oxygen mask, but is able to take it off from time to time to say something to you.  Please know that we don't know if that could change day-to-day.  I will keep everyone posted on that as best as I can.

I've asked over and over again if he's okay with so many people coming by and he keeps saying yes - he wants to see his family and friends.  He wants to say goodbye.  Seeing his nephews made his heart sing, and his Godson will be down shortly.  He smiles a lot when they are around.  He's happy when people remind him of funny stories and moments they have shared with him. 

His coworkers friends came by today and you should have seen how amazing he was - making them laugh.  There were 7 of them and he had them all cracking up.  He told them when they left it was a honor and a privelege to work with them, then cried so hard after they left because he just wants to be able to go back to work and that this wasn't happening.

He's so considerate of others, even through this.  When the transport guys in the ambulance brought him home - he was still on the stretcher asking them if his wife could go get them something to drink.  Even at the hospital this week, despite being in so much pain and so uncomfortable, he'd tell the nurses and techs "bye man - have a good day!".  He's amazing.  We are all so lucky we've had him in our lives. 

If you don't already know how to get a hold of me to make arrangements for coming by, my email address is amygell88@gmail.com, or my cellphone is 954-464-0019.  Call or email me and I will try to respond when I can.  Please bear with me - my phone is ringing of the hook and my inbox is ridiculous - there's just so many people in the world that love Scott.  Also, please call before making a long drive here - things can change at any time and we may need privacy for a bit.

If you can't come see him and you want to get a message to Scott, leave a comment on the blog or email me - I promise I'll get it to him.

Please continue praying for his comfort.  The pain is sometimes very bad. Hospice is doing what they can and is here around the clock taking care of him.

Thank you for all the help, love and support so far - I know there's more to come and there's will be much more of a thank you to come from me later.

With Love,
Amy

P.S.  Before I publish this, I just wanted to include my all-time favorite picture of Scott.  He look so handsome - that smirk is so Scott.